"We've got to go through it."
A child's growth is a mother's joy but also her secret sorrow
This week on Mothering Spirit
With graduation ceremonies upon us, Kathryn Whitaker opens up about the intricacies of parenting young adults through an emotional new season:
“But in the houses of the real moms I know, the ones who are busting their asses to do all the things with great love, I see something deeper, more meaningful, more real. In the midst of filling out school forms and job applications, teaching teens to drive, helping young adults learn how to open a checking account, or hugging a grown kid who wonders if they have any self-worth, I see a mom holding tightly to love, hoping it’s enough.
There is no room for a perfectly curated social media feed. There are tears and prayers. There are laments and surrender. There is worry and fear.
You see, the hard work of motherhood cannot be photographed. Wouldn’t it just be me, bent in half in my closet amidst dirty laundry and shoes, crying out for Jesus’ mercy? Or would it be me ugly crying with both joy and sadness at this new precipice of a season of life?
The forming of young people into confident, healthy, and resilient adults requires suffering. The suffering refines us, purifies us and, sometimes breaks us and our children completely open. It leaves us bare, but it does not leave us alone.”
Read the rest here. Forget the highlight reel: We’ve got to go through it.
Cleaning out closets, switching seasons for kids' clothes, or shopping consignment sales this weekend? Check out our Blessings for Hand-Me-Downs from Laura Kelly Fanucci, for both giving and receiving clothes:
“In the quiet task of sorting and folding,
I ask You, God of compassion,
To hold my tender heart a little longer.
Soften my twinge of sadness at time passing.
Fill my ache for the younger ones they once were.
A child’s growth is a mother’s joy
But also her secret sorrow.
You know this, too, God—
Who are Abba of us all.
What a gift it is to give,
As You have so freely given.”
Read the whole prayer here: “Blessings for Hand-Me-Downs.”
For more on parenting young adults
“The world our grown children live in differs so greatly from ours. No matter how many times I have prayed and settled myself into the wide promises of God, I still wonder how my son will navigate adult life and my daughter her own family.” From Too Big to Be Told” by Jenni Ho-Huan.
A Prayer for Raising Teenagers and Launching Young Adults by Karianna Frey.
“The greatest part of this blessing is seeing my children learn to thrive emotionally—watching them handle hard situations, navigate important conversations, and work through conflicts with emotional maturity. But the unexpected blessing of single motherhood is the call this responsibility places on me to live intentionally and to protect my own emotional health at all costs.” (Me, the Emotional Metronome by Colleen Connell Mitchell)
If you need the hope of a new season
“May the tombs be empty and the gardens full” from Rakhi McCormick.
A poignant blessing from Ashley Holston—The Days Ahead: A Reminder for the Changing of Seasons:
I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good.
So when I see a trial
an unexpected struggle
an unfamiliar season
a potentially hard thing
anything new
anything I’m not used to
headed my way
and uncomfortably close,
when I see it and become
tempted
to hoard manna
I remember:
The Bread of life has been broken for me...
Want to write for us?
We’re looking for short prayers on the following themes related to upcoming essays. If any of these topics speak to you, we’d love to share your words:
Taking your child to therapy - due 6/6
Celebrating Juneteenth with your kids - due 6/13
Parenting with your “village” (or longing for more support) - due 6/20
We’re looking for original prayers (previously published on your social media, blog, or other personal site is fine). We always give you full credit/copyright & tag you on our social media when we publish. Email your prayers to newsletter@motheringspirit.com.
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